Post by Jaylee Lyric Ralston on Jul 10, 2012 19:54:07 GMT -5
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: #000000, width: 300px; height: 300px;]  she's like a rock and you keep chipping off a piece to hold on to. In a life full of exits and entrances. Things were starting to spin out of control. How had it gotten to this point? How could she let herself sink so low? Stress was no excuse for the way she had been acting. Sure there was a 90% chance that her parents were going to get a divorce and sure this summer reading was killing her, but she had never acted like that. The week prior she had basically been perpetually drunk. That was not the Jaylee Ralston she really was. She didn't have flings. She didn't get drunk all the time. There really was something wrong with her. She was beginning to believe what the gossip blog was saying. Maybe she was a total slut. Although the people it said she was sleeping with was all wrong. Jay had never slept with anyone and the fact that the bitch who ran the site said she was sleeping with four guys was outrageous. Jay pulled into her drive way. She rested her head on the steering wheel, taking a deep breath. When she lifted her head she noticed that the same foreign car that had been showing up whenever her dad was out of town and when he mom thought she wasn't going to be home was there. Every time she saw that car her gut churned. It just gave more evidence that her mother was having an affair. Not like she was going to confront her mom or anything. No that was crazy. She couldn't deal with that. Taking another breath she considered leaving and going to crash with Jax, but she decided against it. She got out of her car and made her way towards her house. Her plan was to silently get into the house and make a bee-line for her room. If she didn't see the guy or hear anything then she could still somewhat in the dark, couldn't she? Closing the door quietly behind her, she ran up the stairs to her room, closing the door behind her. Jay kicked her shoes off and replaced her attire with sweatpants and a tank top. She left her light off and crawled into her bed. She pulled the covers over her head before she let the tears she had been holding in softly roll down her cheeks. Everything she had worked for was about to be thrown down the tubes. She didn't even know how she even got picked up on anyone's radar. Jay tried to keep as low a profile that she could as a prep. And then somehow she was all over the gossip blog being called a slut and whatever else. Jay might be making out with Lucas, but that was it and he was the only one. Her mind turned to Alex and how she was accused of sleeping with him too. Sure she talked to the guy whenever she was at the country club and ya there was that one drunk incident, but she hadn't slept with him. She hadn't slept with anyone! She was a virgin for crying out loud! She wiped the tears that were on her cheeks and shut her eyes tightly. This was going to blow every chance she had at Harvard. Sure Jay had the grades and the extra curriculars, but with a reputation like this, even if it wasn't true, she doubted the Ivy League school would let her in. It was what she had been working towards since as long as she could remember and now it was going to be ripped out from under her because petty people didn't have anything better to do with their lives. Jay swallowed the lump in her throat. A part of her just wanted to say screw it all, go get drunk, and tell them all to go screw themselves. The more rational part of her was saying she needed to keep a low profile. She sighed and considered texting Jax and telling him to bring over ice cream and some stupid movie, but she pushed that idea out of her head. She wasn't going to add another guy to the list of people she had supposedly had sex with. No she would just close her eyes and let herself slip into sleep hoping to wake up to figure out the whole thing wasn't real. © melly welly at caution 2.0 & LYRICS BY REGINA SPEKTOR |
