Post by Caleb Xenos Strafford on Aug 10, 2012 2:28:42 GMT -5
| [atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=width,425,true] [atrb=style,background-color: #EFEFEF;] ❝ I t wasn't often that Caleb Strafford would sit in a place that offered alcoholic beverages without ordering one and keeping it close at hand. He wouldn't call himself an alcoholic, but there was something pleasant about the way even the cheapest brands of beer could burn a nice trail down his throat. The shock of the sensation seemed to jolt him awake and keep him alive regardless of all the claims that health nuts made which suggested otherwise. Supposedly alcohol killed his liver and put him several steps closer to an early death or made him more perceptible to some terrible diseases. Supposedly the liquid shot his concentration and perception of reality. But it all seemed ridiculous compared to his own experience. The drink kept his nerves tingling and made him feel like he existed. Without it, he sometimes wondered if he might fade off the face of the earth. If that happened, he questioned if anyone would even notice. He was usually sociable and outgoing, but he was never especially popular. He was the guy that people talked to, but they never stuck around for long because he only served as a dump station when people were overwhelmed by their own petty burdens. He probably needed someone to tell him that he wasn’t living healthily, but no one cared or noticed as long as he kept walking and talking and smiling like life was okay. That was a day in the life of the young man, and he never considered changing a single thing about it. Everything about his life at the moment was routine, and the repetitiveness of it made him feel rest assured that no unexpected surprises would jump out at him. Thus far every surprise he ever received ended badly; he never thought a girl named Addison would show up at his doorstep and make him a father. He could have never foreseen that an accident would leave his life in shambles, first by taking away his child and next by leaving him painfully alone to deal with the grief. The thoughts suddenly made the engagement ring he always kept hidden safely in his wallet feel painfully heavy in his pocket. How long would it be before he could forget everything that had thrown his life out of whack? Suddenly Caleb wished it were night time so he could go out and get wasted. A drunken stupor would have been infinitely better than sitting around feeling heartsick as if something was literally gnawing away at his insides. He considered going ahead and ordering a drink right at that moment, but he never had been too good at acting on his thoughts. Instead he simply sat in the worn wooden chair, gazing at the food he had ordered. He poked around with his fork, occasionally taking a bite and chewing slowly, not quite tasting anything. Eating alone somehow felt wrong, but he couldn’t think of anyone he knew well enough to comfortably invite out. He supposed he’d just have to sit here and take the feeling of isolation that should have felt familiar by now. ❞ |
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